An Assault On My Psyche

Last week while I was at the gym, a place I quite like going, one of the staff asked me if I would do an hour appointment for a TrueStar evaluation. She needed to fill up her sheet so I agreed, although I told her I had no intention of signing up. Thinking it might be interesting to see what the representative would say, I went back to the gym Monday afternoon, having already done my workout in the morning.

We crowded into the tiny office at the back, all five of us. Yes, you heard it right, five! There I sat faced by the talker who never met a person she wouldn't try to sell, her protegee, there to get instruction, and two of the gym staff whom I know and like. At the outset all was fun and I made a couple of jokes which they picked up on. We were hitting it off quite nicely. Then it was down to business and gradually the mood changed. Only the interviewer and I were talking. The others were just listening to all that was said. This felt somewhat uncomfortable as I had not expected to be the centre of attention for a group session. It was as though I was in the centre wearing a dunce cap and the others were heckling me or just observing the heckling.

I watched as the talker punched my information into the computer in response to my answers. First the normal stuff: name, address, phone, email--I wish I hadn't given that!--and then we moved to medical history. I have rarely had anything go wrong in my life except for one major incident 13 years ago, so I had a litany of no's until it got kind of funny. She then asked me about my bowel movements which I hesitated to answer. This was getting pretty personal, especially with an audience. I mentioned a procedure I am having this week and her interest pricked up substantially. I downplayed the procedure--it really is no big deal--but then she wanted to know exactly why I was having it. I balked. "It's private," I said.

Her black eyes widened and I could just imagine this was not the answer she was wanting, especially in front of the three trainees. "You choose not to answer?" she asked.

"That's right," I replied. "You don't need to know."

From then on the interview proceeded without incident except that at least twice she alluded to her inability to assess something because I wouldn't tell her my details about that one thing. I felt the seat get hotter each time. Finally I watched as she proceeded to the 'store' part of the program. Now I've bought enough online to know there is a payout at the end and I would be the person paying. "I haven't told you I'm joining the plan," I interjected.

"Oh, I'm just putting in what I recommend," she hastily replied, as she continued to fill in the Buy box with "1" until she had four or five products. She went too fast for me to see the cost but I knew it was getting up there. Probably at least $200. Finally she was done and I was presented with what I needed to be perfect. Of course, I think I'm pretty good now. What would the total be for someone who had a lot of ticks in the previous health/history part?

I knew my time to exit was nigh and however graceless that would be I was getting out. "Thanks for the information," I said, as I rose and opened the door. No one else got up. "Was there something else?" I asked and got a negative reply. My bullying session was over. As I drove away and for the rest of the afternoon, I pondered what had happened. I knew my trainer, one of the watchers, would be upset and when I went to the gym this morning that was confirmed. Not to worry. I learned a couple of good things and the rest I'll just let recede into oblivion, memory inducers notwithstanding!